Understanding vs. Changing

“I did a lot of psychoanalysis on my anxiety. I got a PhD in psychology. I understood a lot about my anxiety. And I was still anxious as shit.” — My First SE Supervisor.

I’m not anti-analysis by any means, but this quote speaks to the disconnect that can exist between understanding and change — and there’s some brain stuff to explain that. ⁣
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Within the brain, our rational thinking/understanding area (dorso-lateral prefrontal cortex) has no direct connections to the powerful emotional center connected to behavior (amygdala). But the area associated with the ability to be self-aware and feel what we are feeling (medial prefrontal cortex) does.⁣
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What does this mean? It means that simply understanding a trigger or emotionally reactive pattern is often not enough to change it. ⁣
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But something like body-oriented therapy where we consciously sense how experiences feel, what happens in the body when they show up, can help us connect some dots.⁣
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Ultimately the goal is better emotional regulation. When we are frazzled, the emotional brain takes over and we tend to seek out immediate stimulation and gratification; which rarely are things in our own best interest. ⁣
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Don’t misunderstand and think the goal is shutting down the emotional brain. Avoiding these feelings makes us vulnerable to being overwhelmed by them when they do show up, often derailing our progress.⁣
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The process is different for everyone, but generally it’s about finding a way to become focused — to allow the emotional brain to be experienced while learning to stay calm in response to thoughts, images, and sensations that make us want to shut down and distract ourselves. ⁣
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It’s not like flipping a switch, but with guidance and practice, the brain will adapt and be able to integrate understanding with regulation.